Hard on the EyesOne worth keeping

“So ugly he has to sneak up on a glass of water.”

Even his reflection would run off if it saw him coming.

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“He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.”

Comprehensively unfortunate-looking.

“So ugly he'd make a freight train take a dirt road.”

Even machinery swerves to avoid that face.

“Her mama had to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.”

Took bribery just to get the dog's attention.

“Ugly as homemade sin.”

Not just ugly — ugly with extra effort put in.

“A face only a mother could love.”

It takes unconditional love to look at him fondly.

“He looks like ten miles of bad road.”

Rough. Worn out. Hard to look at.